Sunday, September 21, 2008

Your Monthly Miracle

So, real quick... I ran across this ad from a company called C'elle... Their ad is tagged with "Your Monthly Miracle"... Well, I couldn't help not click on it.

Apparently, you can harvest stem cells during your monthly miracle. Because, you might want to live forever and stuff. Stem cells apparently, can help with this. You can buy the kit, harvest the cells and pay a yearly storage fee.

Here's the deal. This has got to be a company full of nothing but men. Oh, yeah, it's a monthly miracle. It's a monthly miracle I don't freakin kill somebody during that "special time"... I know, I know... It really is cool to think that you could make a baby, but damn, otherwise, it's a royal pain.

Anyway, you can purchase the kit for a mere $699. I believe the yearly storage fee is around $100. Once again people, here's the deal. If you think I'm going to buy this expensive ass kit and "harvest" stem cells which, by the way, can not be a pleasant experience, you are crazy... I'm all for stem cell research provided it's not from abortions. They're in bones and umbilical cords, etc so just get them there.

So, how about this. I will contribute to stem cell research and I'll do this. However, you are going to pay me gobs and gobs of money. I think I've just found a way to get rich... I mean, all the money that's spent on this type of research... Shhhheah. Maybe I've just talked myself into it...

On the other hand, I went to Wally World today. And, I got a really LOUD cart... which didn't bother me so much today. I had my ipod in and people needed to be able to hear me coming because, Lord knows, I couldn't hear them. Turned out to be a really fantastic tactic. I'm going to put that one in my back pocket...

Here comes the week... Are you buckled in?? BTW... Can I put my costume on already??


11 comments:

Lipstick said...

Monthy miracle?? Oh my. That reminds me of that old joke...never trust anything that bleeds for seven days and doesn't die.

I do the iPod in the grocery tactic too!

Shan said...

Way back when it was a monthly miracle, it meant I wasn't knocked up!
I am going to have to try the iPod trick next time I go, and a loud cart, I ran over an employee with my cart today.

georgie said...

Oh goodness I was LOL at that 'monthly miracle! and i was SOOOOOO LMAO at a noisey cart and peeps needin to hear you comin!
I dont do noisey carts they drive me insane

Kirsten said...

I thought I was crabby all day, until you explained that it was my "miracle". I feel much better now! :)

MamaNeena said...

Monthly miracle...that is the biggest load of crap I have ever heard!!!! Ask these men to bleed out of their penises every month and we'll see what new word they come up with. Suck it, stem cell men!

The Acorn King said...

You mean I'm not suppose to be wearing my costume yet? Doh!

georgie said...

I am just popping in to check on ya it has been almost a month chica-you must be staying busy! we miss you!!!!

Shan said...

Where you be Momma?

The Acorn King said...

Makes me wonder what I can make money off of. Maybe I can sell the fuzzy monthly miracle in my fridge known as uneaten leftovers.

georgie said...

okay you must really be busy!!!! we are still here waiting to hear about whats been going on...

georgie said...

oh goodness you have been gone for awhile...i hav 3 different avatars/profile pics on here...come back soon....